What betrayal trauma feels like.

It’s like being pushed out of an airplane before you’re ready and you don’t have a parachute.  You’re falling and then you look up and you see that person that you trusted and loved and they’re watching you.  They’re watching you fall and hit the ground and they’re smiling.  Yes, the fall breaks every bone in your body and somehow you managed to survive it. But you don’t feel alive anymore and you certainly don’t feel lucky.  You must remember one thing is that the person didn’t even stop the plane, they didn't even land it they just keep on going.  They didn’t even come back to apologies for what they did to you or even see if you’re ok.  Instead, they picked up a new person along the way.

 It wasn’t just your bones that they shattered, it was your self-worth, your trust, your safety, and your truth and now you feel you don’t understand love anymore.  Honey you just met pure evil, and it killed apart of you before you were ready to die.

I hope that one day that all the beauty that has died in you comes....... back to life. 

Trust me ....Betrayal trauma makes you tolerate a lot of shit you don’t deserve. But healing makes you realize some people don’t deserve to be in your life too. No matter how much you cared for them or loved them don’t expect an apology from them they knew what they were doing and did it at your expense of emotion.

So let it go.  Let them go, let it all burn to the ground.  Let it feel unfamiliar.  Let it feel uncomfortable, just let it be.  What’s meant to be in your life will never hurt you or betray you.  Things may not be unfolding how you imagined but it has opened your eyes on the truth and who they are.  

Trust me it’s all going to work out in the end. You are exactly where you’re supposed to be, seeing the true colors of this person and their pure evil. Now look around you and see what you can and have learned from this trauma.  

The only moment that exists is now and moving on. So, stop blaming yourself ..They knew exactly what they were doing, and also knew exactly how much it would hurt you… So don’t give it another thought, you’re just hurting yourself.  Because you need to find yourself again and be happy, and without them in your life.

Be strong and stand Tall

Concrete Angel you are not alone.